The Midlife Feast
The Midlife Feast
#159 - Story Session: Perimenopause, Boundaries, & the Power of Self-Care Rituals in Midlife with April MacKinnon
In this story session, April MacKinnon, founder of Anointment Natural Skin Care, opens up about nearly a decade of navigating perimenopause. From the early waves of anxiety and disrupted sleep to the surprising strength she found through resistance training, she shares her very relatable experience.
You'll learn:
- How anxiety showed up early in perimenopause and how April found ways to manage it
- Why resistance training helped more than other methods
- What it means to reconnect with your body through skincare, rituals, and rest
- How friendships and parenting shift in midlife—and why boundaries matter more than ever
- Why honoring the transitions of midlife means letting go of outdated identities
- How skincare can be less about appearance and more about self-care.
Connect with April
🏷 Save 20% on Anointment products with the code FEAST20
The Website: anointment.ca
Magnesium Products: nourishedmagnesium.com
Instagram: @anointment
Like what you learned? Check out these other episodes!
Rest to Reset: Redefining Rest and Self-Care
How to Stop the Burnout Train in Midlife with Dr. Leigha Saunders, ND
Why You Need to Put Capacity, Self-Compassion, & Self-Care on the Menu
How to Appreciate Your Changing Menopause Body with Dr. Charlotte Ord
What did you think of this episode? Click here and let me know!
📚 I wrote a book! Eat To Thrive During Menopause will be out on October 21st, 2025. Pre-order your copy today and help get the word out!
Looking for more about midlife, menopause nutrition, and intuitive eating? Click here to grab one of my free guides and learn what I've got "on the menu" including my 1:1 and group programs. https://www.menopausenutritionist.ca/links
Hi and welcome to the Midlife Feast, the podcast for women who are hungry for more in this season of life. I'm your host, dr Jen n Salib-Huber. I'm an intuitive eating dietitian and naturopathic doctor and I help women manage menopause without dieting and food rules. Come to my table, listen and learn from me trusted guest experts in women's health and interviews with women just like you. Each episode brings to the table juicy conversations designed to help you feast on midlife. And if you're looking for more information about menopause, nutrition and intuitive eating, check out the midlife feast community, my monthly membership that combines my no nonsense approach that you all love to nutrition with community, so that you can learn from me and others who can relate to the cheers and challenges of midlife.
Jenn Salib Huber:Hi, april, welcome to the Midlife Feast. So great to see you. So I love doing story sessions, which I'm pretty sure I say at the beginning of every story session. But there's a reason that I love doing them and it's because I love hearing people's stories. So you and I have known each other for 20 years maybe a little bit more than that now and, interestingly, like a lot of our lives have been in like parallel stages right so like we were having babies at the same time, we were building and growing businesses at the same time.
Jenn Salib Huber:But I went into perimenopause a little bit earlier than most, and but now you're kind of. You're kind of in that stage.
April MacKinnon:Yeah, very much.
Jenn Salib Huber:So yeah, so tell, introduce yourself, tell us a little bit about who you are, and and then I want to hear about, kind of what perimenopause has been like for you.
April MacKinnon:Yeah, so I'm April McKinnon I. When you and I met, I owned a baby store called Nurtured in Halifax, nova Scotia, and I have since exited that business and acquired a skincare company called Anointment Natural Skincare, which was at that time a farmer's market skincare company in Halifax and is now a national brand in Canada. It's Canada's only herbal perinatal skincare brand. It's Canada's only herbal perinatal skincare brand. And then, two years ago, I also acquired a second brand called Nourished Magnesium, which is topical magnesium products that promote healthy aging and sleep support.
April MacKinnon:And I am a mother of three children. You're a mother of three children. I am a mother of three children. You're a mother of three children. I'm in Sackville, new Brunswick now and my oldest is 20, which is, you know, when. It has been 20 years then. It has been 20 years because you and I met when you were practicing as a naturopathic doctor and I was concerned about food allergies in my youngest child, and then we became friends and colleagues and our lives have definitely, you know, woven in and out over the past couple of decades. Yeah, so I perimenopause. I stopped breastfeeding my youngest when I was 36. And I think I rolled straight into perimenopause.
Jenn Salib Huber:So how old are you? Now? Let's back up a little bit. I'm 46. Okay, so how old are you now? Let's back up a little bit. I'm 46.
April MacKinnon:Okay, so you're 46. I'm very close to 47, but the calendar hasn't rolled over yet and so you're in perimenopause. I'm in perimenopause now and I would say it's been eight, nine years of perimenopause. I would say yeah, and it started, if I recall correctly, with increased anxiety, which then rolled into which I do remember in puberty as well, having increased anxiety.
April MacKinnon:And then, you know, I have been an anxious person in specific ways, kind of my whole life. But I've found, you know, breathing techniques and just mindfulness ways to manage it over the years. And because I've been in business for 20 years, you just kind of redefine, you find ways to redefine your relationship with stress and failure, and so that has really also helped my own relationship with anxiety in a way of being able to separate it. You know this is not me, these are thoughts that are outside of me and they're manifesting in this way and I just have to kind of roll through it. But there did come a point where the anxiety was really really intense and I have been a runner now for probably the last 15 years and I always found that if I got really stressed or anxious, running would take care of it, and then all of a sudden running wasn't helping anymore, and so I actually took on weight training, resistance training, and it absolutely stopped all of my perimenopause symptoms in their tracks for about a year.
April MacKinnon:Yeah, yeah. I felt incredible for about a year and now I'm rolling back into. You know my cycles are shortening. They're very short now and you know sleeplessness in the week before my period starts what else would I say? Increased anxiety again in that week and hot flashes like night sweats oh, yeah.
April MacKinnon:Yeah, is sort of where I am now. I haven't experienced a lot of you know, some people get that rage. I haven't experienced a lot of rage, but I have experienced sort of low moods that come out of nowhere and again I have to just talk myself through it and remind myself that this is you know, this is happening to me, it is not me, and that's an important reminder. Yeah, that's been sort of my coping strategy for the last eight years or so.
Jenn Salib Huber:Speaking of coping strategies, did you notice or do you notice that your ability to cope with everyday stressors, or big stressors or just kind of stress in general, changed in perimenopause compared to when you were, you know, 20s or 30s? Because that's something I hear a lot from people is, I'm getting super stressed out about things that never used to stress me out.
April MacKinnon:I mean the the last five years I've, you know, there've been a lot of massive changes. There've been a lot of business challenges just because of you know, we've had a pandemic, we've had a lot of economic instability, we have political instability now, and so I've been really rolling with some big punches the last five years and I definitely have built up a resilience callus. I will say so. The small things really don't bother me. It takes an awful lot to. It takes an awfully big wave to really knock me. You know off kilter. You know off kilter, but I do find I get overwhelmed a little more easily and the overwhelm can become paralyzing, like where you just you can't see any way forward.
April MacKinnon:I just have to sit with it for about 24 hours, 48 hours, and usually it will sort of resolve itself. But I have to really be okay with not knowing how to deal with a really big problem for a certain amount of time, until my brain can kind of catch up with the stimulus, if I can put it like that.
Jenn Salib Huber:And that's a big ask of a non perimenopausal brain.
Jenn Salib Huber:But I think it really feels like a really challenging task.
Jenn Salib Huber:And when you pair that with the entrepreneurial, managerial brain, which is see a problem, find a solution, fix it, move on to the next problem that you know that knowing of, I need to sit with this, I need to press pause, I need to take a minute and let the dust settle before I act you can tell I relate to this deeply is very, very challenging, and I also noticed the same thing, whereas I used to just be able to make really like confidently, make quick decisions, and then when I was especially kind of in the stage that you're at, where it sounds like you're in between early and late perimenopause you're still having regular cycles, but they're coming more often, which is the hallmark of early perimenopause, and you're just about to transition into this late perimenopause your whole body and your brain is going through a reconfiguration.
Jenn Salib Huber:Your hormones are just changing. You don't have the same amounts of estrogen and progesterone that you used to have, and so all of those connections, those synapses, those neural roadmaps that you know have been in place for decades in this is what I do in this situation are now kind of like wait a minute, I can't see where we're going. I don't know where the next stop is.
April MacKinnon:So it really takes um, yeah it, it.
Jenn Salib Huber:That's a really hard one. Um, I remember going through that too. What surprised you the most about perimenopause Cause I think a lot of people expect hot flashes, expect mood swings, but what was unexpected?
April MacKinnon:Oh, this, this, these are big ones. Um, oh, these are big ones. I have always been someone who loves to create, who loves to build, who you know. I'm always looking for a new project and I'm finding myself really moving out of that and I know this is a hallmark, too, of midlife. I'm almost done. You know the day-to-day parenting. I'm kind of done with building things from the ground up. You know that, raising something, you know I'm really just wanting to move into something that is a little less taxing.
April MacKinnon:I'm not interested in the hobbies that I used to be interested in that were really about sort of long creative projects. Like I used to be really into sewing, I used to be into textile projects, all of those things, and I'm just I'm. You know I gave all of my supplies away, like I'm just, I'm kind of done with it's, like I'm it's. It's sort of like motherhood was where I I feel like I cracked open out of an eggshell and now I'm I'm. I don't know what the next step is after that, but I'm turning into something completely new all over again. It is a transition and it is my interests are changing.
April MacKinnon:Um, you know, my friendship circle is tightening. I, there are things I just will not tolerate anymore. Um, and here, here, yeah, and so I am not. You know, I, I, I I'm learning boundaries, I feel.
April MacKinnon:I feel like I was 40 before I really understood that boundaries existed and that I was allowed to have them, and so that's been a huge, huge shift in my world as well of just how I manage and, I guess, what I accept in relationships, whether it's friends, whether it's romantic whatever. In relationships, whether it's friends, whether it's romantic whatever and I'm really starting to be very conscious of maintaining my physical health is probably the biggest priority that I can and the biggest gift I can give to myself because of my family history, health history and also just feeling good in my body, and so that takes time away from you know, all of that, like knitting and quilting and whatever that I used to do. So I'm just sort of shifting, yeah, really shifting where my time gets spent and how I prioritize me first, like I get up, I work out, and then it's done, it's taken care of, so that if my day falls apart, at least I've done that for me.
Jenn Salib Huber:I think so many people listening are going to be nodding their heads to pretty much everything you just said. I think the boundaries, especially the inability to do something that we really don't want to do, you know becomes very clear. Thing that we really don't want to do, you know, becomes very clear, you know, like I can't say yes when I want to say no. Now, yeah, I just can't and I've kind of stopped even apologizing for it. I'm like no, thank you.
Jenn Salib Huber:Yeah, well, stop for me, no, it's a complete button, whereas before, like you know, 15 years ago, 20 years ago, I would have justified it, explained it, I would have had to justify it to myself why I was saying no, and then I would have like written a book about why I was saying no. You know, like like I needed to explain it, and I really do think that's a gift of midlife, for sure.
April MacKinnon:Yeah, I mean it does say something about how we're socialized as women as well. But yeah, the um no thank you Period. It's a very powerful statement.
Jenn Salib Huber:Yeah. So let's talk a little bit about skincare, because you started in the skincare business world when you had babies, right? Yes? So how has your relationship to skincare changed now that you're, you know, in your mid forties and perimenopause Cause skincare is, it's such. I mean, it's part of the anti-aging complex, of which I actively rally against, and I know you do as well. But there's taking care of your skin doesn't have to be equated with the anti-aging kind of industry, right? So how has your relationship to skincare changed?
April MacKinnon:Yeah, I mean, my relationship to skincare has always, at least professionally, has always been in the context of how can I support comfort in these massive life transitions, particularly around pregnancy and postpartum, because that's the experience that I was living. Um, and you know, I what I have now professionally in terms of products to support perimenopause and menopause would be more leaning toward the sort of topical magnesium products you know to help with sleep support and you know the soreness, the muscle tightness and all of those things. But for myself personally, like my skincare routine has not changed in 20 years.
Jenn Salib Huber:I.
April MacKinnon:Yeah, wow, yeah, I think I am a little more careful now about, I'm definitely more careful about sunscreen yeah, making sure I always wear sunscreen Because my you know, my mom has had skin cancer, so it's just like it's, and she got it in her 40s and so it's like you know, in the back of my mind make sure you protect yourself.
April MacKinnon:I'm very, I try very hard to stay hydrated Because, you know, healthy skin starts from the inside out, and I think, like I have never been big into beauty per se as far as skincare goes, like I don't have a 17 step skincare routine. I'm literally like toner, moisturizer and that's literally it. Those are my two steps. But I think separating yourself from the anti aging it is, it is really really hard, and accepting that what you see in the mirror is changing is also really really hard, and so I do take a moment to sort of like really look myself in the. My teeth are one of my very favorite things about my appearance. So it's not even about necessarily skincare, but just, you know, appreciating that I had the ability to get my bite corrected and all of that, you know, even in midlife.
Jenn Salib Huber:That ties in, if I can just interrupt you for a minute. So body appreciation is a tool that I use with people that I'm working with and in the midlife feast community to help reduce the amount of body dissatisfaction that we feel, because most people think that body image is about liking what you see, but it's actually about being less dissatisfied with what you have yes, dissatisfied with what you have and the most evidence-based, practical, accessible tool that we have to be less dissatisfied with anything, including the signs of aging, is to appreciate what we have right, and so I love that your practice, like your morning ritual or whatever, involves like body appreciation. That's awesome.
April MacKinnon:Yeah, I mean, I have, um, I've always been sort of mid-sized, I would say, and curvy, and so, um, I definitely remember and you and I have spoken about this before, you know not not recorded um, about the difference between how will I say it, I used to have this idea that if I exercised then I could reward myself with food, and it took a long time and a lot of years to just appreciate having a strong body and what it can do for me.
April MacKinnon:And when I did start you know, resistance training two years ago, like I had to go out and buy all new blouses because my shoulders no longer fit in my own, like my jackets don't fit, my blouses don't fit, anything that I have to like button up doesn't fit anymore because I've put on, like I've put on, muscle in my shoulders and in my arms and now. So now I'm even bigger, and having to be okay with that, like not only is there the weight gain that comes in midlife, but I'm just, you know, I'm bulkier, when the narrative is generally like you're supposed to exist in a smaller body, and so being okay with being bigger because you're stronger is also you know, it's a whole new mental narrative and that's why I'm sure you've seen Alona Mars, all of her videos and you know her messages.
Jenn Salib Huber:And I just saw something this morning. It was a picture of her in a bathing suit and she's like, just to be clear, when I post pictures of myself, I think she was like when I post thirst traps of myself, it's not for the men, it's for the women to know that, like you know, and how powerful is that Like?
Jenn Salib Huber:can you imagine what it would have been like if we had had a role model Like I'm? She's my role model now, even though I'm 30 years older than she is? Yeah, you know, if we had had those kinds of role models instead of like the leotards and the leggings, and you know.
April MacKinnon:Yeah, the heroin chic Heroin chic of the 90s. How unhealthy, it's just crazy. I don't know how it could have gotten worse.
Jenn Salib Huber:Feeling strong in your body and appreciating what your body can do is so powerful. You know, I always say and I've said this probably too many times on the podcast now but when I want to feel confident in my body, I pick up my kettlebell, because doing a kettlebell workout and swinging that thing around and just makes me feel like a badass. And it's not that the insecurities evaporate, because that's not how that works, but it just provides such a strong counterbalance to any of those thoughts that creep up or pop up when you're having a bad body image day.
Jenn Salib Huber:So, it's such a great tool Absolutely disconnected from their bodies. In perimenopause which is something I hear a lot, you know people will say I just don't recognize who I see in the mirror. I don't feel like myself anymore. What would be a simple way that skincare can become that moment of self-care, that moment of connection?
April MacKinnon:Oh, I mean, there's so many, so many things that come to mind. A couple of them, right off the bat, would be to add gentle touch and massage. So, whether that is to your face with moisturizer and just being very, I actually really love gua sha. I'm sure I don't do it correctly, but I love the sensation of the like the quartz on my skin.
April MacKinnon:It's cold usually, and it just feels so nice. I put my moisturizer on and then I kind of just you know, gentle upsweeping motions and it feels. It feels like a massage and like a bit of a drainage, which is what it's meant to do. Like a massage and like a bit of a drainage, which is what it's meant to do, and it just I don't know, I don't know if it's endorphins or if it's just, but it just feels really nice.
April MacKinnon:That's one of my favorites to just, you know, at nighttime, if I'm trying to wind down. Similarly, I mean, you could do it anywhere on your body, anywhere that's tense or tight. You can find a nice moisturizer and, you know, massage shoulders, back of your neck, your temples, if you're stressed, yeah, take a deep exhale like, drop your shoulders, all of those things that they teach us in yoga, because we're often like up around, you know, the days are crazy. So I find I find myself literally, like you know, with my shoulders up around my ears a lot and I have to remember like, okay, just drop them, it's okay.
Jenn Salib Huber:But also like vaginal moisturizing, right, because I mean, you know that is something that a lot of people are surprised to learn about. That. You know, I think everybody has heard about vaginal dryness and vaginal. You know how the vaginal tissues change and often that responds really well to an estrogen based cream, which is, you know, very safe and that kinds of things. But even if you're using an estrogen cream, you do still and should be thinking about moisturizing, because when the tissue's thin and menopause especially, they are more prone to becoming dry and irritated. And that's interestingly where one of the products that you make, push, and the soothing skin ointment are just really, I think, just nice examples of how we can integrate, you know, kind of these everyday moisturizers and care into our routine as like moments of connection.
April MacKinnon:Yeah, I know a lot of people are surprised to find that you know, as often as you should be moisturizing your face, you should also be moisturizing your vulva and that's not a conversation that happens in a lot of places.
Jenn Salib Huber:People are so surprised. They're like what do you mean? Isn't it self moisturizing? I'm like it's self lubricating, but that changes. It's self cleaning, you know. But it is a skin. It's, you know, like an. Any skin. It, you know, needs needs care. Any, any part of our body that is on the outside, and most of our vulva really is, you know, not protected.
April MacKinnon:No, that's right. You know needs that care for sure, and a lot of people will find their face. You know, their face is drier in perimenopause and in menopause, and that is absolutely the case with the vulva as well. So you know, whatever's happening on your face kind of is mirrored.
Jenn Salib Huber:One of my favorite routines. So the magnesium cream that you make I have loved for, you know, many, many years, even before you were making it, it has been a staple of mine, and so I love the lavender one and as part of my, like evening ritual, I just dab a little bit on my fingers, kind of rub it between my hands and rub it around the back of my neck, and you know it's just a ritual of like okay, this is a moment that I'm taking care of me, and I think that that is missing from a lot of rhythms in midlife.
Jenn Salib Huber:Because midlife, even though we have the calling to want to do more for ourselves, life is still pretty busy.
April MacKinnon:It is busy. I've really taken to ritualizing a lot of small things because my life is a bit crazy and is like in constant flux and in transition. So one of the things I like to do I do this on Saturdays. I change my sheets every Saturday, love it, and so I put my sheets in the wash. I try to hang them on the line. If you know. Even better, eight or nine months of the year I can get away with it here and I have I call this fancy sleep, and I didn't make this up, I've. I've found this on. It was like on threads. One day someone was talking about ritualizing small rituals, and so I've co-opted it. From someone else's idea. I went out and bought myself a pair of satin pajamas and I saved them specifically for Saturday night when I that is awesome.
April MacKinnon:So I put my fresh line dried sheets on, I moisturize, I do my skincare routine, I put on, I use belly butter on my legs and, you know, my arms on my body, because it's nice and chocolatey and smells delicious. And then I put on my my satin pajamas and I make myself a chamomile tea and that is my fancy sleep ritual. So that's perfect ritual.
Jenn Salib Huber:So that's perfect. So my ritual on Friday, which I think I've talked about before too, is Friday night is always the night that I like check out early, so as soon as, like, we've had supper and things like that, I like head up to my room, I get into my, my jammies and I like to, I watch TV in bed, I, we, you know, any other night of the week I would never do that, but it's just the like I am, I'm done. I've checked out anything that you need. You need to source it yourself because I am no longer available for anything and I just love it. And the kids will be like mom, it's like 630. I'm like yep, see you later.
Jenn Salib Huber:Yeah, a ritual of, of making sure that like Friday nights are mine is amazing because we only have one TV in our house and so, and we try, and you know, like, share that and so like, and it's not that I watch a lot of TV, mainly because of the logistics of like we have the one TV, but on Friday nights my laptop, netflix definitely is my favorite kind of ritual to ease in. So I totally am going to change my sheets tonight because we're recording this on a Friday and I'm going to make sure that my favorite sleep pajamas are well to nighty, because I can't ever remember wearing pajamas in the last 20 years, but that I am all set for a night of relaxation.
April MacKinnon:Yeah, fancy sleep, the sisterhood of fancy sleep night of relaxation. Yeah, fancy sleep. The sisterhood of fancy sleep.
Jenn Salib Huber:I love it. Okay, so what do you think is the missing ingredient in midlife April?
April MacKinnon:The missing ingredient in midlife.
Jenn Salib Huber:The first thing that comes to mind is connection. Yeah, I love it. Connection for sure, because our friendships change right. Yeah, when we're, when we have younger kids, it's so easy to connect with people because your kids are like the point of connection, but when they get older, you know like you don't have that. I find that friendships are just as meaningful, but they're fewer and far between, and the opportunities for meeting people are fewer and far between.
April MacKinnon:Yes, yeah, yeah, I really try to prioritize. You know, most of my friends live remotely from me and so I really try to prioritize phone calls, although I fully know if I'm calling a couple of people I'm in it for four hours, so I have to set aside almost an entire day. But yeah, trying to like maintaining female friendships I feel like is going to be the key long term and really making sure, and also because my kids are now moving out and becoming independent, the way I foster my relationship with them is changing. You know, I am no longer sort of in their day-to-day worlds. I have to check in with them, they check in with me. I have to make sure, like I have to work at maintaining a relationship with them as adults and signing consent forms for field trips and sports teams and all of the day-to-day parenting.
April MacKinnon:So I'm moving out of that phase and into more like it's not quite friendship because I'm still their parent, but the things that get shared, the range of topics, is very wide. It's like how do I fix my car? How do I do? What do I do about car? How do I, you know, how do I do? What do I do about this conflict with a friend or a significant other. Or you know how do I choose a college. Or you know I'm stressed out about exams, like all of the big topics. Topics are getting bigger and the nature of our relationship is changing and I really love that. But it is a whole new skill set to develop as a parent as well myself.
Jenn Salib Huber:She's almost an adult. She's almost an adult. The restraint it takes, the internal restraint not to parent in the way that you've always parented, requires a lot of mental energy. That.
April MacKinnon:I don't always have and to not freak out when they tell you things that you really didn't want to hear. But you know it's important because if they're, if they trust you enough to bring it to you, um, you know, you have to stay emotionally regulated. That is literally the job of parenting and so, um, yeah, when you're like, oh boy, okay, I wasn't quite prepared for that, but they've brought it to me and I can't shame them for that, I can. You know, we have to work through this now in a way that is constructive and not yeah, not, you know, losing your temper or you know having a complete meltdown about it.
Jenn Salib Huber:Well, I 100% agree that connection is a missing ingredient. Yeah, and thank you for connecting with us in this conversation. And so where can people learn more about anointment?
April MacKinnon:Yeah, so you can find anointment at anointmentca, A-N-O-I-N-T-M-E-N-Tca and nourishedmagnesiumcom. And yeah, those are both Canadian based websites, but we ship worldwide based websites, but, um you know, we ship worldwide Awesome.
Jenn Salib Huber:Thanks so much for joining me on the midlife feast today, and I know that this conversation will um be well received by people who are in this age and stage and we'll be able to relate to so much of what we were talking about.
April MacKinnon:It's such a pleasure to be able to see you face to face, even though you're across a wide ocean. But it's always, always, always a treat.
Jenn Salib Huber:Thanks, april. Thank you Thanks for tuning in to this week's episode of the Midlife Feast. For more non-diet, health, hormone and general midlife support. Click the link in the show notes to learn how you can work and learn from me. Click the link in the show notes to learn how you can work and learn from me. And if you enjoyed this episode and found it helpful, please consider leaving a review or subscribing, because it helps other women just like you find us and feel supported in midlife.
